As my first post, I would like to address one of the ever growing issues in today’s society: the loss and lack of femininity and modesty. I have noticed how of late it has become much more apparent than it ever has; everywhere you turn you find traces of feminine degradation. On the news and in the media, in music, in schools and in the workforce there is a sign of secularism and perversion towards women. Although women are “the gentle sex”, they have tended to be treated like “objects” in some cultures, and nowadays pornography, contraception and abortion are actually encouraged, leading to the very destruction of the female body and soul. It saddens me to see such a decrease in good, young women and I have no clue when it all went wrong!
Very frequently I notice how women are trying to compete with men to prove to the “stronger sex” that they aren’t “weak” and deserve the same amount of rights by taking over men’s jobs and competing with them intellectually. Our society encourages “strong” and independent women; you can find this in politics with Hilary Clinton and of course on television with women like Rosie O’Donnell and Ellen DeGeneres. Women are congratulated when they make in into the Army and go off to fight, and when they do “hard” jobs that should otherwise be for men (like being prison guards, police officers, and road workers) Some women are glad to inform you that they do not plan on getting married and never ever want kids and they love being able to “support” themselves. Being a feminine woman does not mean being independent and selfish even though our society tells us that. And since our culture doesn’t encourage femininity, men aren’t encouraged to be chivalrous, a much needed quality in men. So because men aren’t encouraged to be masculine and chivalrous, marriages are going downhill extremely fast.
Luckily, being feminine does not make a woman weak at all. If anything, femininity makes a women stronger in ideals, respect and in faith. Being feminine means being gentle, compassionate, very modest, charitable, kind, considerate of others and of course respecting and listening to what men have to say. Men and women thankfully are not “wired alike” and have different emotions, thoughts and feelings. But God made man and woman this different on purpose. Not to make them unequal but to make them complementary. Men become masculine and “themselves” thanks to the love and affection of their wives and the wives are transformed by their husbands’ strength and courage.
Sure, men are stronger and more dominant than women but that is nothing to be ashamed of. Sure men are more inventive, creative and productive seeing that most theologians, philosophers and artists have been men. But women nurture, care for others and suffer with and for everyone possible; it is infinitely more valuable in God’s eyes to suffer out of love for him that to conquer nations and fly to the moon.
For example, the great sufferings of St. Theresa of Avila, St. Therese of Lisieux and Saint Bernadette are perfect models of true femininity, even though they constantly referred to themselves as “weak”. They teach us the power and acceptance of ones weakness and of an infinite confidence in God’s love and power through prayer and penance. Also, St. Monica who brought St. Augustine back to God, St. Francis de Sales and St. John Bosco’s mothers were key factors in these saints way to holiness- a sure sign that being a mother and praying for your children requires great trials and tribulations.
So the solution to bringing back femininity? Well, Alice von Hildebrand, author of “The Privilege of Being a Woman” knows the perfect and simple way for increasing pure, holy femininity in the world. She says that “Women can find supernatural strength in what feminism perceives as her weakness and look to MARY as a model of PERFECT femininity”. Most certainly, through imitating the Mother of God will women, the guardians of purity, find their way back to the beauty and dignity of their mission to get to heaven. You can’t go wrong when you have the Mother of God as your model and your mediator to God in heaven. Even though Mary is perfect and sinless while we are so sinful, it should be every woman’s goal to imitate the virtues of our most beloved Mother.
So, when women see that it is not weak to be feminine and that being a woman is a privilege will women gain respect. And until women receive respect from men and in return women learn to respect themselves in word, dress, and deed will our generation have hope. Only until marriages are kept sacred and infinite will women gain femininity. And only until women imitate the Blessed Virgin Mary and men imitate St. Joseph will marriages be redefined.
And then hopefully, through the Holy Family and through the communion of Saints will men become true men to help make women become true women.